Tag Archives: Family

Unconditional Love – Remembering Kira

Dogs have a way of finding the people who need them
– Thom Jones

Three years ago, on Blue Monday 2019, I saw a scruffy and forlorn German shepherd staring out at me from a Rescue site on Twitter, and I knew in my soul she was already a part of me.

She was advertised as a five-year-old with issues and EPI, a life-long health problem. We spent a couple of weeks persuading the Rescue centre she should be ours and on 10^th February she was.

From rescue centre to our home… February 2019 © Lisa Shambrook

Her age ended up being fairly ambiguous, as she’d been advertised as five for two years on social media, so it was more likely she was around six or seven when she got to us. She’d been rescued from a home of neglect when she was three, so her early years were troubled, and then she spent at least two years in a rescue kennel miles away from anywhere and pretty much alone. She was fostered and rehomed several times, but always returned because her anxiety was too much to deal with. Nicola, a foster carer, did her best to save Kia and gave her love and training, but wasn’t able to keep her. A year later Kira came to us, her forever home.

We thought we’d have longer with her, not even three years, but she filled a lifetime in those few years…

Kira: six or seven years old © Lisa Shambrook

She was a dreamer – always staring off into the distance and looking romantic. She was my soul mate, she was everything.

We soon realised that her anxiety was too great to be able to walk her locally, she was too reactive to other dogs, so it was off to the forest and she loved it there. Like us she loved solitude and the purity of nature.

Flowers, they were as beautiful as she was. I could never get over how pretty she was, she blew me away every time I gazed at her. She was like the stars in the sky, the flowers in the hedgerow, the water flowing in the river, she was uncontainable.

As beautiful as the flowers © Lisa Shambrook

There was a gentleness that only we saw. She saved it for those she loved and felt safe with, and there weren’t many people in her life that gave her that. She was a teddy bear, a soft cuddly baby, and a dog that loved with everything she had when she loved you. She only trusted a handful of people in her life, and if you were one of those, you were truly privileged.

She was never happier than when she was out exploring. She always walked at the furthest point her lead let her, but if you took her lead off out on a walk, she panicked. She needed to stay connected and it gave her security and comfort.

Kira loved her cuddly toys. Elephant was her first and favourite with us. Kira’s toys were generally not for playing with, they were for comfort. She decided what happened with her toys. If we tried to take her indoor toys outside, she’d shake her head at us, and immediately take them back indoors. She wasn’t one for fetch either, throw a ball and she’d stare at it then back at you, and ask why?

Kira and her beloved toys © Lisa Shambrook

The day it snowed on New Year’s Eve 2020 was one of her best days! She loved the snow, eating it, catching snowballs, and racing about with us in it. It was beautiful, and her smile says it all!

Back in Brechfa she was her true spirit, a fae of a dog, a forest dweller, and a creature of magic…

She had a wild heart that filled you with wonder.

At one with nature in Brechfa Forest © Lisa Shambrook

Then it all went wrong. She slowed down a little, but at what we thought was nine-years-old dogs do get a little slower. She had an ear infection, which got sorted at the vet. Then in September she started reverse sneezing, didn’t seem much to worry about, but it didn’t go away. In October it got worse and she began coughing. The vets were lovely, Kira’s a very difficult dog to take to the vet due to her high anxiety and panic, but the vets saw her outside and dealt with her with incredible care. At first we thought she had kennel cough and she was treated for that, but it didn’t get better. She lost her voice, lost her bark, and I knew something was really wrong. Kira was a chatty dog that talked all the time, and now she couldn’t.

After six weeks she had scans, x-rays, and a biopsy. At the back of her throat was a mass. It was an aggressive malignant salivary gland tumour. We were devastated. We hoped we’d have longer with her, but eating became difficult. We gave her tins of salmon, her favourite, until one day she couldn’t eat anymore, and the tumour was too large to allow comfortable eating and breathing. We knew the time had come.

Sunday 14^th November was the hardest day, and she passed peacefully away in our arms.

Our hearts broke but we let her go to run free in far flung fields, and to find Roxy who would mother her like we did. There is nothing like the pain of losing your soul mate.

She is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.
You are her life, her love, her leader.
She will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of her heart.
You owe it to her to be worthy of such devotion.
– Agnes Repplier

Kira – our German Shepherd – May 2012 – 14^th November 2021

Twenty-one Things I Love About Caitlin…

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Twenty-one Things I Love About You…
To my daughter, Caitlin, on your Twenty-first Birthday!

You took us into a new millennium with a strong spirit and a head of dark hair.

2. When you’d had enough hugs you’d say your tummy was full, you knew your limits.

3. Purple Teddy went everywhere with you and you even made local headline news when he got lost.

4. Your sense of adventure took you off on trips that we didn’t even know about ‘til you got home!

5. You are a tiger, our Growlithe, unable to keep still and full of mischief!

6. You love changing clothes, from army camouflage, to ballerina tutus, to trying on my wedding dress, and I could just as easily find you at a ballet barre or up a tree.

7. Full of sparkle, stars, a strong sense of self, and the heart of a wild fae.

8. Every star is different, and you shine bright like a star in the night sky.

9. You have a quick temper and a wit that is much older than you are. There’s an early cynicism in your heart, don’t let it unbalance hope.

10. Enthusiasm lights you up when you’re learning about things that matter to you, keep that sense of justice and belief in what matters most.

11. You are growing into yourself, with beauty, grace, and empathy. Don’t let anyone dull your soul.

12. Keep that stubborn streak and your sense of fair play.

13. You love creative arts – writing, drawing, and anything that lets you express yourself.

14. Sometimes you just want to fit in, but you have a spirit that fights the system that experiments and embraces life in all its colours, and I know you will be whoever you want to be.

15. Roxy is your best friend, and you both have loyalty and love in your hearts.

16. A wry and morbid sense of humour measures you, but life is hard and that wit grounds you. You’re politically aware – you need that humour!

17. You are carving out your place in this world, using art, compassion, and integrity.

18. Kira gives you solace in an unstable world and you fight for all that’s right. Never stop doing that.

19. Never forget to be yourself. Be true.

20. You know your worth, a daughter of courage and spirit, our daughter…

21. The world is at your feet…it’s yours…

*Note: All photographs within this post are copyright to Caitlin or Lisa and are not to be reproduced or copied in any way.

Beneath the Old Oak – A tale of Courage and Growth

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Beneath the Old Oak is a story that brings forth a young girl’s courage
and helps her grow through tragedy like a tiny acorn turns into a majestic oak.

Beneath the Old Oak © Lisa Shambrook

Meg’s mother is having a breakdown, and Meg can’t cope.
Seeking to escape bullies and overwhelming anxiety,
she discovers an old oak tree whose revelations begin to change her life.

Beneath the Old Oak is released through BHC Press on 16^th October and is a novel that will completely captivate you.

Beneath the Old Oak © Lisa Shambrook

“A brave book that tackles serious issues for a younger audience in a mature and sensitive way.” —LibraryThing Early Reviewers

Beneath the Old Oak © Lisa Shambrook

“I was awake until about 1am reading this one. I could have put it down anytime, just didn’t want to.
This story leans heavily to the subject of depression. There are many of those on the kindle, few quite as believable, even less as credible. The family with a single child are wonderfully developed as they are deeply troubled. A father who goes to work and his involvement limited in their troubled life, a mother slowly slipping away from all of them, and a young girl with too much weight on her shoulders left to clean up the mess.
…the oak tree becomes symbolic of the escape from harsh reality for both mother and child when there are so many issues that should be confronted, so many secrets that should be out in the open.
This is the kind of book I recommend people read regardless of what kind of genre you prefer. It’s one for everybody. Just read it.” —Mr D. on Amazon

Beneath the Old Oak is now available in eBook and paperback (choose your format) at:
Amazon UK, Amazon US, and your local Amazon. Barnes and Noble, Waterstones, Google Play, Kobo, iTunes, and other online outlets.

Beneath the Old Oak by Lisa Shambrook

Beneath the Old Oak is the second book in the Surviving Hope novels, following Beneath the Rainbow already available, and once you’ve been charmed by Beneath the Old Oak you’ll be excited to read Beneath the Distant Star which releases on 11^th December – and my publisher has offered a number of ARC copies of Beneath the Distant Star through LibraryThing. In exchange for an honest review you can read a prepublication copy of Beneath the Distant Star. Pop over, scroll down and request your copy now.

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In Need of a Hug…

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Feel the presence of love, wrapped up within a hug – Robert M. Hensel

In Need of a Hug - How Hugging offers affection, love, protection, and compassion - the last krystallos

I read this week that the more you hug your children the faster their brains develop. New-born babies shown more affection had stronger brain responses. This shouldn’t be a surprise. Touch and hugs show affection, love, protection, and compassion, everything a child needs. It’s one of the reasons babies are born and placed on their mother’s chest or at their breast – skin-on-skin touch helps bonding and gives comfort.

I also watched a report of a man, Antar Davidson, working with children recently separated from their mother in a migrant detention home in Tucson, who was asked to intervene and explain to three siblings aged 16, 10, and 8 that it was against shelter policy to hug. He was told to tell them to stop hugging. Antar refused and quit his job. These children only had each other left in a terrifying and alien situation and they were asked to relinquish touch between each other. It seems an atrocious and altogether backward move to make.

Then I saw this video of ten abandoned baby ducklings released into a pond. The pond’s resident mother duck, having recently hatched her own family of nine, immediately rushed to their side and ushered the orphans into her own family.

These three reports had a lasting effect on me this week. I’ve been distressed at the news of families being ripped apart at US borders. No matter your thoughts on immigration, removing a child from its parent is categorically wrong and never, ever the answer. Compassion seems to have taken a holiday from the current administration’s hearts.

A hug is worth a thousand words – anon - the last krystallos

Removing touch from a relationship can be dangerous. The ability to convey love and emotion within a relationship is paramount to keeping a bond and an emotional connection. One of our basic needs is to feel closeness, to touch each other, and to feel security within love. Animals know this. My dog welcomes us home with physical touch, and my cats rub against us and crave being stroked.

Most of us welcome each other with a hug, or a kiss, or a handshake, depending on your relationship. I’m not a tactile person, and if I don’t know you don’t try to hug me. I have personal space, control, and consent issues and to share a hug with me I have to be emotionally connected to you. My immediate family, and very close friends are the only ones who can break into my physical hug circle. But I crave touch as much as my cats do!

You can't give a hug without getting a hug – anon - the last krystallos

I love holding hands, hugging, and snuggling with my husband, and my children give me the most amazing hugs! The act of a hug offers me security and love. To be denied this would damage me as a human being.

The mother duck immediately knew what the little ducklings needed. Affection and security and she offered both within moments of meeting them. This world is so divisive, judgmental, and bigoted we need acceptance, compassion, and love.

Can we welcome all those in need the same way this duck embraced an expanding brood?

The best place in the world is inside a hug – J Quest

There are myriad articles out there extolling the benefits of hugs
and physical touch – and as long as consent is given – always ask first –
you should get and give as much as you can!

Lose Yourself with Ghostbird, Blodeuwedd, Myth and Magic…

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Sometimes a book resonates with an emotional response you didn’t expect,
but it draws you in and you fall in love – Carol Lovekin’s Ghostbird does just that.

Lose Yourself with Ghostbird, Blodeuwedd, Myth and Magic... - The Last Krystallos

I don’t often blog about books, the last times I did were The Slow Regard of Silent Things by Patrick Rothfuss, and Nobody Told Me: Love in the Time of Dementia by S. R. Karfelt and I have to be enchanted or moved before it hits these pages. My reading genres are eclectic, I like a bit of everything, but I fall heavily for beautifully written fantasy, a little romance, and quirky magic.

I was browsing my books and read the caption on the reverse of Ghostbird from Rebecca Mascull who said ‘Carol Lovekin’s prose is full of beautifully strange poetry.’ and I began reading.

This is the tale of Cadi, who doesn’t know who she is. She’s never been told anything about her father, she can taste the cloying secrets, and she is determined to uncover and break the spells about her. Her mother, Violet, is distant and lost, and her aunt, Lili, is bound by a promise she desperately wants to break.

The Hopkins women are well known in their little Welsh village, and they are surrounded by a cloak of mystery, flowers, magic, and a little bit of local scandal.

Ghostbird Carol Lovekin - trying out words - The Last Krystallos

Carol Lovekin’s writing enthralled me, from beginning to end, and I truly did fall in love. She writes with poetic leaning, creating beauty and an enticing story. This is my kind of writing, with description that made me feel like I inhabited Cadi and Lili’s lives. The story has an ethereal quality and this is even more prevalent with the inclusion of the ghostbird of the title. This book unravels the secrets regarding the Hopkins women with a little myth and magic along the way.

The story of Blodeuwedd, from the Mabinogion, is referenced throughout, something I loved having studied the Four Branches of the Mabinogion with my daughter last year. This meant I was already up to speed with Blodeuwedd’s tragic story.

Cait's Blodeuwedd Owl mask - The Last Krystallos

Cait’s Blodeuwedd Owl mask © Lisa Shambrook

I asked Ghostbird’s author, Carol, about including the story of Blodeuwedd and how it had inspired her:

‘The idea for Ghostbird was a slow burner. I read the myth of Blodeuwedd (from the Mabinogion) in the early 80s and was immediately struck by the notion that her fate: to be turned into a bird, was a curse. As an owl, Blodeuwedd could surely find her freedom by flying away? It was yet another woman’s story begging to be retold from her perspective. So many legends and myths are of their time (and written by men) and by definition, patriarchal.

The idea stayed with me until, years later it re-emerged as the backstory to Ghostbird. At first I planned for the ghost’s voice to be incidental, albeit relevant. It was my astute editor who insisted, the ghost had to play a more prominent role. It was a joy to take the bones of the myth and turn it into the soundtrack to my modern ghost story. And in the process, to discover, that’s what I write: ghost stories!’

When I first read Blodeuwedd’s story I’d come to a very similar conclusion – despite the fact that being turned into an owl was essentially a punishment, it seemed to me to be a poor punishment, as it meant she finally had freedom. She’d been created without thought to who she was, and made for someone else’s pleasure, and rebelling against that had caused retribution, but to me she was given freedom and final liberty.

The use of myth and legend within fiction is something that inspires me. My current work is based on a myth, but a legend of my own writing. I resonated with Carol’s words about most old fairytales and myths having been written by men with suffering women within the stories, so writing my own legend, which you can find in A Symphony of Dragons, meant creating a woman resilient enough to carry the myth on her own. The resulting legend, threads through The Seren Stone Chronicles which I am currently enjoying writing.

Ghostbird - Carol Lovekin - The Last Krystallos

I loved Ghostbird, because Cadi’s story echoed similar themes I’d explored in my own books. Beneath the Rainbow and Beneath the Distant Star both dealt with grief and loss, and mother daughter relationships, and Beneath the Old Oak spoke of family secrets. Ghostbird moved in different circles, with beauty, grace, and fierce women determined to protect and discover who they are. This is a book that will stay with me, for its magic, emotion, and tender charm.

Carol Lovekin is published by Honno a Welsh Women’s Press committed to giving opportunities for talented women in Wales to see their work in print. Carol’s stories reflect her love of the landscape and mythology of Wales. She is a committed feminist and has always found fiction the perfect vehicle for telling women’s collective stories. She began writing with a view to publication in her late fifties, having ‘suffered from arrested development for far too long.’ She now writes to keep up.

Ghostbird is her debut novel and Snow Sisters is her second book.

Ghostbird Carol Lovekin - old magic will hear - The Last Krystallos

My parting words for Ghostbird are that so often I read sentences that just spoke to me, that described my own feelings, my own experiences, and it’s not often that an author can climb inside your head and touch you. This book touched my heart, the vulnerable bits and the happy bits.

Ghostbird - Carol Lovekin - Honno Press
You can buy:
Ghostbird by Carol Lovekin from Honno
from your local bookstores,
on Amazon UK Kindle, and Paperback.

Please visit her blog for further information and links.

Ten Places I Found Joy This Winter

What is the Love in Your Life?

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Valentine’s Day always makes me think about the love in my life
So, here it is, everything that means Love to me…

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What brings you LOVE in your life?

Vince, Bekah, Dan, and Caitlin © Lisa Shambrook

My instant response to what brings me the most joy and love in my life is easy – my Family. My husband and children have brought me every emotion under the moon, but love overrides it all. My marriage and partnership with my husband is the most important relationship to me as my children came from this union. I’ve written about our love before and it’s blatantly obvious how much my children mean to me. Each one of them is a unique human being and I love how different each relationship is, how much fun and laughter and joy they bring to my life.
This is Love.

Soft fur, purrs (the cats, they can’t help it!), devotion, dependence, twinkling eyes, curling up on your lap (yes, even a sixty pound German Shepherd tries this!), adoration, kneading kitty paws, wagging tail (generally the dog!), wet noses, pricked up ears, padding paws. Rusty, Roxy, Misty and Raven.
This is Love.

I don’t often write about my religious views and my Faith. My faith is vast, ever evolving, and it embraces humanity with a Christ-like vision, but my Christianity intertwines with aspects of nature and Paganism and the peace of Buddhism. I think Spirituality is a vast subject and faith is very personal. My beliefs make sense to me, and no one can challenge what my heart reveals to me.
This is Love.

I need a Creative outlet, without it I’d go quietly mad. I draw, plan, sketch, paint, sculpt, write, design, craft, photograph, and create. I create worlds with words, characters, plots, emotion, and dragons. I share my emotions in every piece I write or make.
This is Love.

Most of the things that bring me love are free, family, faith, nature, pets, imagination, but sometimes we have material items that mean something to us. If I wear something ‘til it’s worn out, then it’s been needed and loved. My leather jackets end up worn and torn, as do my beloved boots. I adore gems, I love pretty things, so my bracelet adorned with silver tokens and Murano glass beads means a great deal to me. Each trinket and bead means something, a moment, a place, people, something precious. And as I’m a squirrel, bushy-tailed and anxiously curious I have a thing for acorn cups and hazelnut shells.
This is Love.

What is the Love in your life?

Twenty-one Things I Love About Dan…

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Twenty-one Things I Love About You…

To my son, Daniel, on your Twenty-first Birthday!

Dan…Twenty-one on friday!

You lit up my world from the first moment you kicked into this world, my head-strong beautiful son.
One…
Your smile has always been one of my favourite things about you. You can light the darkest place with it.
Two…
Your eager delight at the world about you. Your excitable nature from shweep to slox…(sheep and socks!)
Three…
Our little Danny boy, full of mischief and fearless adventure!
Four…
Your straight-forwardness is strength. Your favourite animal at Gelli Aur aged five was “A big animal with sticks on his head!” A stag.
Five…
Like a bulldozer you throw yourself into everything with true gusto and sometimes very little thought for consequences, but you always survive!
Six…
I love how you share and love, your love runs deep and strong.
Seven…
You have empathy that will guide both you and those about you, and your example will always inspire.
Eight…
I have never met anyone who can bond so easily and so well with so many, and make a positive difference in their lives!
Nine…
You have an endearing innocence and naivety, and this is why so many will love you for your honesty and integrity.
Ten…
Your smile lights up so many lives as your sense of fun shines through!
Eleven…
You embrace the simplicity and beauty of life with courage and joy!
Twelve…
You can be anyone you want to be, dig deep, work hard, and be true to yourself.
Thirteen…
Don’t ever give in. Life can be tough and frustrating, but you can always overcome and win!
Fourteen…
You have grown slowly with confidence and you will become a beacon of light, a lighthouse…
Fifteen…
The way you love is deep and honest and without bars, and your hugs can heal broken spirits.
Sixteen…
Your sense of adventure will take you far and help you carve your place, don’t lose it!
Seventeen…
I love your spirit of generosity. You care deeply for those around you and always fight for those in need.
Eighteen…
Strength and devotion are both naturally abundant in your nature, a true soul of beauty.
Nineteen…
You know your worth, a son of faith and spirit, our son…
Twenty…
The world is at your feet…it’s yours…
Twenty-one…

*Note: All photographs within this post are copyright to Rebekah, Caitlin, or Lisa and are not to be reproduced or copied in any way.

Silver Wedding Anniversary – Twenty-five Years Together

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Today, 5^th October, Vince and I celebrate 25 years together
and our Silver Wedding Anniversary…

I want to link to a couple of posts, the first is: our 20^th Anniversary and our Twenty Expressions of Love…♥ I’m so moved when I read back over the words that our love has produced…

I want to add five more:

♥ After twenty-five years we know each other well, we understand each other as well as we can, given our differences, and what we don’t understand we lovingly accept.

♥ We both feel that spiritual and physical bond that holding hands gives you, and physical intimacy brings both immense emotional and spiritual intimacy.

♥ Time is a blessing, time spent together strengthens and deepens our love, and walks on the beach, or through woodlands, or across mountains, or anywhere together increases and heightens our affection.

♥ The love and humour our family has is an eternal bond, something that ties us together no matter where we are. We, as a family, will always be united whether we are oceans apart or sitting side-by-side, and the winds of time cannot change that, our family makes us whole.

♥ We know the strength of a hug, of arms wrapped tight around each other. We know it in sorrow and in joy, and in unity of love.

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Twenty-five years – Vince and Lisa… One photo a year from 1991 – 2016

We’ve changed in many ways: in looks, personality, character, knowledge, wisdom, emotions, understanding, and much more. We’ve grown and become very different people to who we were twenty-five years ago, but we’ve found solace, compassion, love, strength, and passion within each other and a bond that pushes the boundaries of this life.

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On our Twentieth…

I’ve written a couple of other posts about love and relationships, so if you’re interested: How to Feel Loved – Discover your Love Strategy and learn about how you feel and give love, and: The Most Valuable Way to a Happy and Successful Relationship and see how kindness works.

Here’s to the next Twenty-five Years!

♥ With all my love ♥

How to Feel Loved – Discover your Love Strategy

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Have you ever considered what makes you feel loved?
Do you know how to make others feel appreciated and valued?
Read on…and discover your love strategy…

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A thought-provoking post inspired me to consider what makes me feel loved, how does love manifest itself to me, and what makes me feel good? I found the original post on Head, Heart, Health and discovered more on NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) sites and posts about Love Strategies.

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So, take a moment and think about what makes you feel loved?

Is it a word whispered in your ear, or a thoughtful gift, or holding hands?

We have three basic Love Strategies: Visual, Auditory and Kinaesthetic.

Visual: the need to see love – that special look, flowers, that thoughtful gift, romantic acts and gestures, rose petals on the bed…

Auditory: the need to hear it – whispered words of love, sensual talk, the tone of voice, poetry…

Kinaesthetic: the need to feel love – the touch of your loved one, holding hands, cuddling close, an unexpected kiss…

The idea is to work out which you are, and that’s where it got interesting for me. I looked at how I felt loved within my relationship, and then how I feel loved in general.

how-to-feel-loved-the-last-krystallos-rose-petals

To begin with, being an observer, I believed I’d have a visual Love Strategy, but on deeper consideration I found the visuals were less important to me than the kinaesthetic aspect.

You need to ask yourself which of the three could you do without, then get serious and break it down to just one choice. I knew that in my relationship, if my partner couldn’t show me love with flowers, gifts or that look in his eye, I’d be okay as long as I could still feel his touch. Hearing the words, I love you, are so important but if I was deaf, it would still be his hug and a stroke down my arm that would mean more. So I knew I was kinaesthetic.

This became even more apparent when I thought about what makes me feel loved in general. What makes me feel good – is seeing, or hearing, or feeling more important to me?

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Again, I’m an observer who notices everything, the small things: the heron alighting by the lake, the flower in the hedgerow, the clouds sailing across the sky…but it’s the things I feel that affect me most. The silky taste of Spanish hot chocolate makes my heart sigh. Pulling a woolly jumper or blanket around me comforts me, the velvet feel of rose petals between my thumb and finger calms me. I love splashing through the ocean’s surf, kicking through autumn leaves or crunching through snow…all these delight me. Sinking into water and swimming, I love the feel of the wind caressing my hair, sunbeams kissing my skin and hugs from those I love. Seeing and hearing compliment my experiences, but I need to be enveloped, engulfed, and immersed to really feel and it’s tactile for me.

All these things show me that my love strategy, the sense that makes me feel the best, is kinaesthetic.

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What’s yours?

We can enhance our relationships if we understand what makes us tick, what makes us feel good. Not just in romantic encounters but in life itself. If we know what makes our loved ones happy we can create healthier and stronger bonds, and we can all feel more loved.