Many people feel anxious, but what does an Anxiety Disorder feel like?
I’ve suffered with an anxiety disorder since I was a child, and for many years I just thought I was a worrier, and I always felt there was a derogatory association with being a worrier.
Many people believe you need to have reasons to be anxious.
We all suffer anxiety: going into an exam, taking your driving test, being late for work, when you’re about to give a presentation, travelling, and more. You get that flutter of worry in your belly, nausea, light-headedness, fear of the unknown, fear of failure… but the difference between GAD, Generalised Anxiety Disorder, and situational anxiety is that those symptoms and emotions go away. You know that your exam will be over in a few hours, your driving test will be complete, you’ll get to work, that presentation will be finished, you will have reached your destination and the worry will be over, and you will move on. The reason for your anxiety will be resolved.
Generalised Anxiety Disorder does not give you that luxury.
Imagine those symptoms continuing for the rest of the day, the week, the month…
I’ve learned a lot about my anxiety. I’m on antidepressants and my anxiety has been much lower, but I recently mentioned to my husband that I was feeling anxious again. Now, he’s incredibly supportive and very understanding, but to someone who has never experienced depression or severe anxiety it’s a difficult condition to comprehend. I tried to explain that there were several things on the horizon worrying me, but there’s more to anxiety than that.
There doesn’t have to be a reason.
I tried to explain what anxiety felt like.
It’s like you are treading water with no land in sight. This is what anxiety feels like.
You believe you will drown. This is what anxiety feels like.
Now, common sense tells you that a log might float by and you could grab it, or a boat might sail past and rescue you, or a lifebelt might appear – but as your brain puts those ideas out there, it also brings in a rolling fog. Now you’re treading water in fog and you can’t see anything. This is what anxiety feels like.
That log will float right by, that boat will sail right past, and that lifebelt is out of reach. Pretty quickly, as anxiety heightens, the waves about you grow and you’re treading water in fog and ten foot waves. This is what anxiety feels like.
That log is about to tip off the wave above you and knock you out. The boat is off course and will never find you, and that lifebelt, well, it’s gone. This is what anxiety feels like.
To top it all, beneath you a whirlpool whips up, you can’t breathe, you can’t keep your head above water, you’re getting pulled under, and you will drown. This is what anxiety and a panic attack feels like.
Anxiety removes the common sense option. Anxiety tells you you’re going to drown and your mind cannot get past that.
Depression is often referred to as the Black Dog, and you can’t command the black dog to return to its kennel, instead it jumps at you and hangs about your neck, or it pulls you down and holds you in a half-nelson. Anxiety is a Boa Constrictor. It’s a snake that coils about your legs and works its way up your body, squeezing and coiling tighter – and it doesn’t let go.
If you’ve never experienced long term anxiety it’s very difficult to understand.
Sarah has opened a floodgate of understanding and validation for those with anxiety, and I asked her how she came up with the hashtag:
-Sarah Fader CEO and Founder Stigma Fighters www.stigmafighters.com
It is liberating. Firstly, we know we’re not alone, and secondly, it offers an insight into what life is like with an anxiety disorder.
Just a few examples… Severe anxiety is exhausting to live with, both for the sufferer and their family.
I’m working with my therapist to find ways to deal with my anxiety, and I’m currently using ACT, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. I’m finding the more I accept and acknowledge my anxiety, the more power I have over it. Learning to recognise and use this will take time and effort, and anxiety is likely to always be part of my life.
Take time to understand the debilitating nature of this condition and use patience and compassion when we need it.
Validation is the first step to helping someone recognise and cope with their anxiety.
How do you manage and what helps you when you feel overwhelmed and lost?